I nedd to catch a break before the breaks don’t break no more

This has not been a good day. It started well with the fresh icy air puncturing my soul as I rushed to school and the insecure voinces of my fellow schoolmates filling the classroom as they tried to debate for something they didnät believe in. But gradually I just grew tired of everything. I tried to cheer myself up with buying some clothes at a secondhand market after school. That kind of helped, I truly love clothes, especially cheap ones! But the bad feelings started to creep up again. They just wouldn’t leave me alone. Nothing helped. I met up with Ive, Victoria and Linda over some cake. If friends and cake can’t help you, you know you’re in deep shit.

I need to get away. I’ve been checking out some applications to study a year abroad. New Zealand would be the best experience ever. For as long as I can remember I’ve always wanted to go to New Zealand. Or America, gosh Chicago would be the dream. And if I apply I know my grades are good enough for me to get in. There’s just one problem, or well there are a lot of problems but there is one BIG obstacle. My folks. The tuition payments aint cheap. I hope they are willing but I doubt it. But te tuition payments do cover everything for a whole year.

I really need this. I can’t get past this feeling anymore. I’ve ignored this, this need to leave, for a few months. But Croatia was the boiling point, I realized that I didn’t miss a lot of what I had left in Sweden. How can you ignore a feeling like that? Please tell me, if you got some tips, because right now I’m torturing myself.

I need change.

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